Personal essay explores how cooking with her son supports eating disorder recovery

A mother describes cooking chocolate pudding with her six-year-old son as part of her recovery from a decades-long eating disorder. She reflects on how cooking together helps her model a healthy relationship with food without passing on perfectionism. Her own childhood involved women who treated cooking with territorial pride and exacting standards—her grandmother attended culinary school in Chicago and sold homemade candies, while her mother maintained high culinary expectations. These experiences initially connected food with reverence and secrecy, contributing to disordered eating patterns that persisted through college. During her recovery, she worked with pastry chefs recognized by the James Beard Foundation, learning that cooking could involve both precision and flexibility. Now she facilitates a peer support group on Zoom twice monthly for others in eating disorder recovery. The essay mentions a Michelin-starred restaurant in Brittany where her family dined when her son was four. She emphasizes avoiding numerical discussions in support groups to focus on connection rather than comparison.